Does the Universe Meddle in Its Own History?

Of course it does. Temps, for example, are like us all composed of matter, matter that is of the universe as it is in it. As the temps meddle in time, then so does the universe.

But as it turns out it might be more literal than that.

A pair of otherwise distinguished physicists have suggested that the hypothesized Higgs boson, which physicists hope to produce with the collider, might be so abhorrent to nature that its creation would ripple backward through time and stop the collider before it could make one, like a time traveler who goes back in time to kill his grandfather.

-Dennis Overbye for The New York Times

So what are the temps’ roles in all this? Are they to protect the collider from from its future enemies? Or are they the saboteurs, agents of the natural order? Perhaps it’s not out of fear of the Higgs boson that the universe conspires against the projects, but out of greed. If the collider could be stymied, then the first man-made Higgs boson will not come into existence until December of 2012–an event in history that a rogue time tourism company has billed as the end of the world and sold a lot of tickets to. So many tickets that they have to deliver.

Spoiler Alert: If you’ve not read Vonnegut’s Sirens of Titan and wish to do so, you might want to not read the second to last paragraph in that article.

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10 comments

  1. Epidiah · October 15, 2009

    Spoiler Alert is the layman’s Paradox Warning. Discuss.

  2. Jmstar · October 16, 2009

    Written by “Overbye”. Subtle, universal meddlers.

  3. Epidiah · October 16, 2009

    That is rather ominous.

  4. Richard · October 16, 2009

    What a great article!

    I think that this could turn out to be a whole campaign for the temps. The first time they go through to stop the collider in the US in 1993. They would have to use a large amount of political wrangling to accomplish that goal.
    Then they need to go sabotage the CERN collider. They might go a little overboard with this initial CERN sabotage. I mean a connection between two magnets that shuts down the collider for a year??? Sounds Suspicious.

    Such suspicions among a bunch of physicists could cause a lot of unneeded trouble. Maybe even the premature discovery of time travel by someone other than BCE! So the temps have to go back and try and make the initial sabotage less damaging. This could involve a good bit of bilocation and ample opportunities to interact with the non-self members of the other group. ( Bill, what happened to your arm? … Bill, how is your arm all better now? … )

    It could become a seesaw of several adventures with an ever increasing chance of the world going poof..

    They could be 2 sets of temps from different “times”. The later group now knows that finding the Higgs boson is necessary. So the first older set are the saboteurs and the younger set have to stop it. Of course, the first set did really crappy documentation of their missions and half of what they did is lost, so the young ones have a small amount of mainly incorrect information to work from.

  5. Richard · November 8, 2009

    The story is going to the birds. Look who the Temps have given the blame for the latest failure to ,,,

    http://news.cnet.com/8301-17852_3-10392917-71.html?tag=mncol;posts

  6. Richard · November 11, 2009

    And now TIME magazine has joined the fun:
    http://mobile.time.com/he_ne/290309/

  7. Epidiah · November 21, 2009
  8. Richard · May 27, 2010

    It has begun. Looks like one of the temps got caught!

    http://crave.cnet.co.uk/gadgets/0,39029552,49305387,00.htm

  9. Richard · May 27, 2010

    oops. I thought that was a new article. It appears the article actually came out April 1. Sorry for any confusion.

  10. Epidiah · May 27, 2010

    A delightful article, nonetheless.

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